Why buy this cow?
Maybe it's me, but I don't get a good feeling from seeing Jerry O'Connell, Ryan Reynolds and company supposedly revealing aspects of romantic life in what must be a comedy (it's sad, but any movie with cow in the title - or one appearing on the poster - is most likely low-brow humor).
The movie, depending on your level of optimism, is either one big metaphor, or a justification for the title. No matter where you fall, the film is unaware of subtlety. Even the gags are so over the top, they have no actual humor.
Okay, I'll admit I laughed at a few things. It's not really enough, though.
Extensive voice-overs by the main character tend to call a lot of attention to themselves. Usually, it means the writer couldn't figure out how to tell the story, or sometimes, something doesn't come across in the acting that the audience needs to understand. It can work in cases, like in Clueless, where it's really more about character than exposition. Here, it just yanks you out of the narrative. The words just float there, sounding like they're important to someone, just not anyone we see on screen at the moment.
The ending has some reasonably decent choices, but when you can see the supposed twist as far in advance (I'd guess fifteen minutes or so) as I did, it's really quite sad - it's the sort of thing a movie builds up to, and a lot of effort spent, for what ends up being anti-climactic.
No wonder this went straight to cable/video.
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